Kikyo's Life
by DizzyWizzle
Summary: Kikyo thinks about her life so far


Leaves crunched beneath her feet. Wind swept her hair backwards, twirling it beautifully. The setting sun's rays shone on her pale skin.

Yet she could feel nothing.

That was the curse of the dead. If she could even be called that. Her body was made of dirt and bones; her life sustained barely by the departing souls of other, her will, the duty to destroy her killer was the only thing keeping her going and a promise that had yet to be fulfilled.

She did not deserve this. Surely she didn't. All she had wanted was to become a normal woman, to marry, have children and die an old woman besides her beloved husband.

But it had all been robbed.

* * *

She was doomed from the day she was born. Having extraordinary spiritual powers, she was sent to the shrines to be raised as a powerful miko. She was to protect those around her and serve and give herself to the gods and the gods only.

Growing up she watched in sorrow and hurt as the other girls her age married, to lead lives as mothers. All the while, she was alone. Of course, she had her younger sibling, but it wasn't the same. She craved the love and attention other girls' received. But it was not meant to be. She was bound by the gods. And when the Shikon Jewel was thrust into her protection, she finally came to accept her fate. Her judgment against the world changed and her personality with it. Her once warm and welcoming orbs turned hard and determined. Her features became stoic, locking away emotions that could distract her from her tasks. She would become the perfect miko. Cold and ruthless to yokai, as she should be, yet she would care and protect the villagers.

Until she met him.

He was so like her that she couldn't help but open her heart to him. His lonely-ness gripped at hers and they couldn't help but fall for each other. Only two things stood in their way. She, being duty bound, while he half of what she destroyed, yokai.

Time passed and the love they had only grew. He protected her, gave her the love and attention she had craved all those years ago. Yet she couldn't let go of the fact he was hanyou. What would others think? Would they lose their faith in her? Days turned to weeks and weeks into months as she wracked her brain for ways to allow him into her life fully. And when the idea came, she had to laugh at her stupidity. The answer was in front of her all this time. She would use the Shikon jewel to turn him human. She had thought it through and it was fool proof. The jewel would need a wish to disappear. And she in turn needed the Jewel to disappear for her to become a normal woman.

Steeling her nerves she asked him. Unlike what other girls did, all shyly and daintily, she said it outright. It was the way she was and he loved her for it. The shock on his features ate away at her insides. What if he was going to reject? What if she wasn't worth it? Wasn't worth the change so that they could live together in peace and love. What if-

_**Yes**_

Her heart beat froze and a tiny sharp intake of air caused her breathing to stop. He said yes! She really was worth it! Unable to break her calm and collected façade she let through the warmest of smiles she could muster, and by the brightening of his orbs she could tell it was beautiful. While her heart skipped and missed beats she and her hanyou lover arranged the meeting where the wish would be made and the beginning of their new life began.

But like most things in her imperfect world, this was not meant to be…

She was running a tad late and new that he was too, for he had yet to spring up like he usually did. She was walking across the meadow of their choice, her mind thinking of all the possible things that would happen from this moment on. Would she have a large wedding? Should she train someone else to take her place? Or simply import a new miko from another village? Her musings causing her to lose focus and concentration, she didn't hear the running footsteps coming up fast behind her. Not until she felt sharp claws dragging their way through her soft flesh, tearing it open and leaving an almighty, and fatal gash.

_Iie…Not yet! I have yet to live! _She cried within her mind, while her body fell onto the hard ground.

_**Idiot. I never even considered becoming human…Thanks for giving me the Jewel.**_

_Inuyasha?_

_**The Jewel **_the voice of her beloved hanyou purred _**I need to let it soak up more blood. The village will do nicely. **_

Her heart froze over. The villagers would be slaughtered. How could she have been such a fool? To trust a being half demonic? Watching with tear filled orbs as her hanyou lover ran swiftly towards the village, she used every ounce of her strength to reach her people in time.

_Die Inuyasha! _She yelled as she sent a glowing arrow towards him only to impale him through his chest and sealing him to the Sacred Tree. _I trusted you. I really trusted you! _

Hatred and betrayal nestled within her broken heart, and as she watched her Shikon Jewel bounce along the ground, her body gave a cold shiver.

_**K-Kikyo…How could…I thought... **_His eyes closed and his outstretched hand fell limp. It was over.

Her heart was breaking and her life's blood was seeping out of her damaged body faster than she could heal.. She knew she didn't have long left. But she had to protect the Jewel. For an instant her eyes rolled back and her body fell forward.

_No! The jewel must be protected!_ And with that in mind, she caught herself and staggered over to the Jewel that had destroyed her one chance at being happy. Falling to her weakened knee's she picked up the Jewel.

_I forgot what i…And now see what… _Pain wracked her body and she gave a cry.

_Kikyo! Sister Kikyo! _Came a child's voice, and at once she knew it was Kaede _Those wounds!_

_Kaede, take the Jewel and burn it with my body. It must never fall into the hands of evil again…_ another wave of pain and it was all her weakened body could take. With a painful sigh she died, her beloved hanyou's name racing through her mind.

As told, she was burned with the jewel. Alas it wasn't the end for her tragic life. Fifty years had passed and a demon witch has stolen her bones and ashes and recreated her body out of soil, bones and clay. Her reincarnation had been brought back into the past and her soul was transferred into the fake body along with the painful memories of the betrayal and heart ache.

* * *

And here she was, not living yet not dead. Walking the earth trying to avenge her unjustly death. She had uncovered the truth about her demise. That it was the evil hanyou Naraku that had killed her, and not her hanyou, Inuyasha. But they were all to blame. Every one of them. Inuyasha for distracting her of her duty, Naraku for her death and her reincarnation, Kagome, for living the life she should have had. That was rightly hers.

She would finish her task. And like she had hoped for, if the walking dead could have such a thing as hope, she would return to her eternal slumber. Bathe within the glow of the afterlife and be rid of the plague that was her emotions that had consumed her very being.

Someday she would be free. It was only a matter of time now.

* * *

_**Well what do you think? I was watching some AMV's of Kikyo on YouTube and this popped into my head! Please comment on what you think! Thanks! x**_


End file.
